choices and consequences
At a particularly tumultuous time in my life when the winter winds were blowing in the northland that I called home, I was facing several major life crossroads with no clear direction. The stakes seemed high, they were. And I wanted to make the right choice. Though I sought direction in every form of prayer I knew, still the voice of God seemed eerily silent.
One afternoon I found myself in the relatively anonymous office of an administrator to whom I was to report at least one of my decisions. For reasons that will forever remain a mystery, I spilled my sorry tale on this dear woman’s desk that was undoubtedly already filled with plenty of tales of her own. She listened, or at least pretended too, and then looked at me with remarkable compassion and spoke what I would come to understand as the Spirit’s words.
“Katy, life isn’t about right and wrong choices. Life is about choices and consequences.”
At any given crossroads, any and every choice we make will produce both expected and unexpected consequences. Letting go of the need to define and identify the right choice enables us to prepare for and be open to the consequences of life as they unfold. Although this philosophy would preclude my ever getting it ‘right’, I would also never be ‘wrong’. And most importantly, I would never be without God’s blessing. With this assurance, I was able to get ‘unstuck’ and move on with my life, both personally and professionally.
I have made many choices that I’m very proud of and a few I’d rather were forgotten. Some of my choices have had delightfully unexpected blessings, some have offered unexpected challenges, most have offered some of both. One of the life choices that was most difficult to make was that of marrying. I wasn’t one of the starry eyed brides who feels “right” and I agonized that silence. I plunged into marriage wide eyed and fearful but comforted by the Spirit words of choice and consequence, and I have been utterly amazed at the continually unfolding blessings of my relationship with Gary (the challenges will hold until another article!). Another choice for which the right answer was missing was our move to St. Louis and Evangelical UCC. By the time we actually signed a contract together, we knew enough about each other to have legitimate reservations. Yet with the gift of a decade shared in ministry, I find myself utterly overwhelmed with the blessing of our shared joys and sorrows. Never would I have anticipated some of the challenges we have navigated, never would I have guessed the incredible fun that ministry has become.
Choices and consequences… and in all of them the remembrance of a safe haven in a winter storm, the reassuring voice of God.
